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feature articles Home, Living, & Real Estate A Mother of Many | A Mother of Many |
| Written by Brandon Lowe | |||||||||
| Monday, 05 May 2008 | |||||||||
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The national average is 2.5 kids. Many families make the leap to three, perhaps to avoid that tricky half-child. There are those who choose to have four, but really, they're moving toward the fringe of society. Five kids weren't uncommon several years ago, but today, that number pushes the capacity of standard homes and cars. When you get up to six or seven kids, you're in Brady Bunch and Waltons territory. Meet the Ray family. That's Angela and Terry-and their eight kids. Come June, it will be nine kids. And they don't even have a TV show. The children are Tara, 20; Tyler, 14; Melody, 13; Joshua, 11; Charity, 10; Jeremiah, 9; Gloria, 6; and Josiah, 4. To keep the pattern going, number nine is a girl. When the Rays were first married, they had no intention of having a large family. Angela already had Tara, and they thought, perhaps, they'd have one more.
The Rays live on 30 acres in Washburn, Tennessee. Tara lives on her own now, and Angela homeschools the rest, except for Josiah. Terry is in engineering software sales at Modern Tech in West Knoxville. Angela has what she calls a "master plan" for each day. She confesses that while it looks good on paper, when it comes to children, it's not always possible to stick to a schedule. Everyone gets up around 7:30 and eats breakfast-if they make it themselves. "I don't fix breakfast," Angela says. "The kids eat cereal, and they all know how to make toast!" They skip cleanup after breakfast to tackle schoolwork. At 11:00, everyone breaks for chores, including lunch preparation. After lunch comes more studying, then the all-important quiet time. "Sometimes the little ones sleep, but everyone can read, write or chill out for an hour," Angela says. "People think it must be like Cheaper by the Dozen around here, and we do have our moments, but after quiet time, our home gets pretty mellow." After quiet time comes the last of the schoolwork and a few quick chores before Dad gets home. Music practice might be part of the afternoon schedule, as Melody, Joshua, Charity and Jeremiah play piano, and Tyler plays trumpet. The kids also have duties with the family's three beehives. They enjoyed their first honey harvest last year.
The kids don't play organized sports. The family enjoyed playing basketball at the YMCA three years ago, but it consumed every Saturday for two months, Angela says, so it just didn't work for their family. She heeded the advice of a friend who said it was okay to limit outside activities as long as the family had plenty of fun together. So, family bike rides, Smokies baseball games and treks to Dollywood and Splash Country have replaced basketball Saturdays. Angela wouldn't have it any other way. "I just enjoy having my family around. I can't imagine my life without our children. I feel so blessed. It consumes us sometimes, training our children. But watching them grow is such a rewarding experience." The family received national attention in 2006 when they appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show. The Rays came to the attention of Harpo Studios after the Knoxville News Sentinel published a story about them. Angela received the call while she was grocery shopping, but thought it was a joke until they checked the phone number. The theme of the show was "A day in the life of... women in their 30s," and Angela was chosen to represent stay-at-home moms. A film crew was sent to the Rays' home, and Angela was flown to the studio for an interview with the most famous woman in America. "It was neat. Everyone thought it was a lot of fun," Angela says, but admits she was nervous when she arrived in Chicago. It helped to get a tour of the set before the audience arrived. "It made me uncomfortable for people to make such a big to-do over me. But the producers were so nice, friendly and open, they made you feel comfortable." Angela has spent time with many other families, and feels her perspective as a mother of eight isn't entirely different from that of any other mother. "The thing I'm learning is that whether you have 2 or 3, or 5, or whatever, we all have the same struggles. We're a lot alike."
          
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But Angela and Terry were impacted by a crusade speaker who lectured on the sovereignty of God, and decided to put their lives entirely in God's hands. Their family was forever changed by that decision.
